Migration
Seafood eatery in Kaiserslautern undone by so-so food, terrible service
Stars and Stripes
December 20, 2018
The dining room of Lissabon, a Portuguese-style seafood restaurant located in Kaiserslautern, Germany on Dec. 9. The setting was cozy, the food was fair and the service was horrible. (Will Morris/Stars and Stripes)
The dining room of Lissabon, a Portuguese-style seafood restaurant located in Kaiserslautern, Germany on Dec. 9. The setting was cozy, the food was fair and the service was horrible. (Will Morris/Stars and Stripes)
Grilled calamari in butter sauce as served at Lissabon in Kaiserslautern, Germany on Dec. 9. The dish was tasty, not rubbery as calamari often is, and included a few extras -- not all of them desired. (Will Morris/Stars and Stripes)
The grilled fish platter at Lissabon in Kaiserslautern, Germany on Dec. 9. The assortment of four types of fish and calamari was tasty but at times greasy. (Will Morris/Stars and Stripes)
It wasn’t finding a hair in my grilled calamari that did it.
It wasn’t that the cocktail shrimp — the only thing that resembled seafood in my “seafood soup” — hadn’t been deveined.
It wasn’t that the grilled salmon was somehow both partially raw and greasy at the same time, or that no one removed the pin bones. It wasn’t even having four obnoxious people placed at a four-top next to mine when the rest of the restaurant was empty.
What put me off about Lissabon was the server blatantly ignoring my wife for no reason for 15 minutes when she needed napkins to wipe fish guts off her hands.
Having your server walk past five times without even looking at you while your hands are dripping with fish innards at the end of a bad meal is a sure way to ruin a birthday dinner.
I had great hopes for Lissabon, a restaurant known for Portuguese-style seafood. It was the first restaurant I read about when I found out I was coming to Kaiserslautern. By almost all accounts on social media, Lissabon held great promise. Other patrons complained about long waits for food, but promised it was worth the wait. A Stars and Stripes review from five years ago was positive overall. I had been waiting to eat there for more than a year when my wife said we should go.
Lissabon wasn’t all bad. The appetizers, a plate of “crab balls,” were great — steaming hot, crispy and loaded with crab. Even my grilled calamari was good, if you ignore the extra ingredient. The atmosphere in Lissabon is actually quaint and cozy, if you ignore the two video poker machines in the bar, which takes up half the restaurant.
The prices are OK, and average about 15 euros. There are other options than fish.
Maybe I came on a bad night. Maybe the server was having a bad day. Regardless, I will not be giving her or Lissabon a second chance.
Address: 8 Wormser Strasse, Kaiserslautern, GermanyDirections: Take Ludwig Strasse east to Mannheimer Strasse and then north to Wormser Strasse. Lissabon will be located on the right.Dress: CasualMenu: Portuguese, English and GermanFood: Portuguese, mostly seafood. Prices average 15 euros per main entree.Hours: 11:30 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5:30 p.m.-10 p.m. Saturday and Sunday; 5:30 p.m.-10 p.m. Tuesday to Friday. Closed Monday.